Masterful Mindset – Borrowing Worry from the Future
“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its troubles. It empties today of its strengths.” ~ Corrie Ten Boom
Question:
Do you worry so much about the future that you fail to enjoy the present moment? Do you find that your thoughts are often so consumed by negative “what if” scenarios that you let those future worries paralyze you and keep you from taking action in the present moment?
Action Challenge:
It’s good to plan for the future. After all, that’s what goals are all about right? And we might never move forward in life if we didn’t set our sights on something we want in the future. But what happens when you start over thinking the future? What happens when you start borrowing worry from the future?
If your thoughts are always consumed with the future, and in particularly a million negative “what if” scenarios about the future, well then, that’s when being a future thinker (which we’ll talk more about next week) becomes a hazard to your present happiness and takes all your power away in the moment.
Recently a client of mine was facing several big changes. And with those changes came decisions that had to be made and actions that had to be taken. All without any control of the outcome or knowing for certain what the future would hold. (Truth Bomb – Even if we “think” we know what the future holds, there really are no guarantees.)
Of course, sometimes thinking we know how the future will unfold, eases the worry. And without a doubt, planning and taking action in the present moment to prepare for the future is good. However, it can be very easy to get caught in the habit of borrowing worry from the future. So what’s the difference between having some worry and wonder over the unknown and borrowing worry from the future? It is in where we go after the original worry. Let me explain…
My client had applied for a promotion in her company and of course, she was nervous about whether or not she’d get the job. But then even before she got the promotion, she began worrying and wondering if she could really make the move and do the job. That is borrowing worry from the future. She didn’t even know if the original outcome would work out and yet she was already worrying about the next thing. She was starting to drown in a sea of “what if” scenarios. “What if I get this and can’t do the work? (aka – What if I fail?) What if I hate it? Or worse, what if I don’t get it and I’m stuck where I’m at?” And on she went. So as we talked through it, I encouraged her to put her energy into what she could control, which was preparing for her interview and how she would show up in that moment. And then to let go of that future worry, after all it was just doubt and fear about her abilities, sabotaging her thoughts. Then once she’d gotten the job (which she did) she could start preparing, learning and taking action in that moment for the next thing – which was being able to make the move and do well at her new job.
Go ahead and think about your future. It’s important to plan for it. And in that planning, sure, there might be a bit of worry or wonder. But borrowing worry from the future only paralyzes you and keeps you stuck from taking action in the present. It can make you feel extremely overwhelmed. And it keeps you from enjoying the happiness you have now. Instead, when you are planning, remember this, you can only take action in the present moment on the things that are within your control. Now is when and where you can do something, now is the only place action can happen. And by doing the actions now, it is productive. Worry is not productive. Worry is just toxic.
My challenge to you is to break the habit of borrowing worry from the future. Just like a bad habit of nail biting when you are nervous, negative worry thoughts are just another bad habit too. It’s time to break that habit! And it starts with being aware of what it is you are doing that you want to change. So pay close attention to your thoughts, especially when you feel fearful of the unknown future. Stop yourself when you start to go into borrowing worry from the future. (A good sign that you are doing it is that you feel very overwhelmed or fearful.) And instead, refocus to what is presently in front of you that you can take action on to move forward in the direction you desire. Of course, there’s no guarantee that you will reach your goal with a certain outcome. No one can promise that. But why borrow worry from the future? Instead take action in the direction you desire and then when you get to the next space on your life’s timeline, you can tackle that day’s worries all on their own. Trust me on this one, you will be stronger, more able and much happier when you stop borrowing worry from the future and start living your best life today.
***Join me for more on this subject tomorrow, Tuesday, June 18th at 11am PT/2pm ET for Facebook Live on my Facebook Biz Page: Coach Michelle Weimer.
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