Masterful Mindset – Grow From The Past

“You could stay stuck on woulda, coulda, shoulda or you can be empowered by will, can and shall.”  ~ Michelle Weimer

Question:

What mistakes or failures have you made that taught you something valuable? What difficulties have you experienced that made you stronger? What past challenges have helped you grow and become better?

Action Challenge:

It’s easy to see past experiences of hard times, disappointments or failures as bad things. I mean, no one really likes to experience them. But we often spend so much time focusing on the past struggle, that we don’t realize the valuable lessons those struggles often teach us. And consequently, we miss the opportunities for growth, joy and success that are in front of us in the present moment because we are so fixated on the past pain.

We also overlook the fact that if it weren’t for those difficulties, we may not be the person we are now. Of course, if you are a bitter and unhappy person… well then, it’s time for a change. But think about this, you may be compassionate and empathetic because you know what heartache feels like. Or hardworking and determined because you know what falling short means. Those are examples of what past experiences can do for you.

So what’s the difference between the person who is left bitter and the one who is better? It’s mindset. It’s the difference between having a fixed mindset or a growth mindset. It’s taking the experiences of the past and fixating on them, staying stuck in them. Or taking those experiences and using them to learn and grow from them. Using them as a tool to step up to another level.

Growth means to increase or get bigger. Growing moves you in a direction, usually upward (think trees, grass, flowers and kids). Most things grow up. Not down. So your own personal growth and development will grow up – uplevel – if you will stay in a growth mindset and not a fixed mindset.

Let those past experiences be the fertilizer for your growth. I mean hey, when you feel like you are dealing with a lot of shit, use it as fertilizer and let it help you grow!

We all have struggles, we all have disappointments, failures and hard times. That’s life. It isn’t always rainbows and unicorns. But go ahead and put on those rose-colored glasses while you do the work… it makes the view better and the journey happier.

So you have a choice… Will you stay fixed on the past with it’s struggles or will you grow from the past and step into the present moment empowered and driven? Will you tell stories of woulda, coulda, shoulda or will you jump up and say I will, I can and I shall?

My challenge to you is to become a student of growth. (See the chart image above, adapted from Carol S. Dweck, PhD) Take on a growth mindset instead of a fixed mindset any time you are faced with a setback, disappointment, failure or any other difficulty. And for goodness sake, let go of the old stuff! Those struggles may actually have been the rough stuff that polished you into the beautiful soul you are today. So be thankful for the experiences and then let go of the past so you can live fully in the present moment.

Take those woulda, coulda, shoulda statements you catch yourself saying and change them to WILL, CAN and SHALL –  then see where they take you. The possibilities are endless…

***Join me for more on this subject tomorrow, Tuesday, June 11th at 11am PT/2pm ET for Facebook Live on my Facebook Biz Page: Coach Michelle Weimer.

***I want to hear from you… Share your comments about this week’s topic below.