Special Edition ~ Why My Tribe is Named Tuff Chicks and Not Tough Chicks

“The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.” ~ Gestalt

Several years ago, I changed my Facebook group’s name from “Tough” Chicks to “Tuff” Chicks and today, I want to share the story of why…

For starters, I realized some time ago that being tough isn’t really what this group is all about. If you look up the word “tough” in the dictionary, you see things like: not tender, difficult, stubborn, hard, hardened, troublesome, rough, vicious, inflexible, etc.  There are some good words in there, like strong and durable, but for the most part, the definitions were negative. And that is not what we are all about.

This led me to think of a poem that was given to me by a dear friend many years ago. It’s titled, “A Strong Woman vs. A Woman of Strength.” That’s when it hit me; I had to change the name. No longer does the idea of being tough serve me, my clients or most anyone.  Thinking I had to be “tough” was a story I carried with me from my past, and like most stories from the past, it really doesn’t serve who I am now or who I want to be.

So, I started playing with ideas. I decided to look up the word “tuff.”  And guess what? A tuff, is a relatively soft, porous rock that is usually formed by the compaction of volcanic ash or dust. So now you’re thinking, “Well, I’m not a rock!” Awe, but wait… I like this idea. We are all formed by the bits and pieces of our lives that make us whole; our families, our experiences, our education, our faith, etc. It’s these pieces that compact together to create who we are. As Gestalt would say, “the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.”  And a soft, porous rock… the words soft and rock seem like a contradiction. But I think that’s the beauty of the idea. We can be solid, full of strength, powerful and yet, we can be soft, smooth, open to what is around us.  All characteristics of the woman I want to be.

So, there you have it, being a Tuff Chick is really about realizing that there is so much more to us then the hard exterior we show to people. Sure, we are strong but we are also love, hope, compassion and more… We are women! And we can take all the many different parts we are made of to become whatever we choose. Here’s to being Your Best True You my fellow Tuff Chick!

***Building a community with compassion starts with you… If you know someone who might enjoy being a part of our group, I would love it if you’d share the group with them. Here’s the link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/tuffchicks/

***I want to hear from you… Share your comments below.